Yesterday was a hard, hard day. I couldn't visit with DH because all he would say was "get me out of here" and get so agitated. I sat on a bench down the hall from his room. That's where the Dr., nurse, Pallative care worker and psychistrist all came down and talked to me. I only saw him once all day. I was so nervous the whole time I was there that I could have jumped out of my skin. He was combative all night and I heard him yelling at the gals who changed his bed all the way down the hall. He was yelling and cussing at them. He hit the lift girl yesterday. He was taken to the nursing home last night at 5. That was what I was so worried aboout. I called at 10 to see how he did. He said he didn't know where he was and the nurse said he had been sleeping most of the time until they changed him. Then she told me "he didn't like that. You know what that means". So they had a hard time with him. I will go Sunday and take his other things over. I don't know if I will go see him or not. That is what is making me cry so much. I could be spending time with him but he can't get by just wanting me taking him home. That's all he said to me the whole week he was in the hospital. I just have to walk out of the room. In the NH he can just follow me out. He did stand up last night but they sat him right down again. I hope I get to see him again. The hospital suggested that I call in Hospice and I said I thought that was only for people six months out and she just nodded. Of course none of us know really but that is what they are thinking. He wasn't eating in the hospital so I'm hoping they will plop him in a wheelchair if he can't walk and take him to the dining room and put food in front of him. Maybe then he will eat. He was eating before he went to the hospital. I won't be going on about this here so much. I just can't bring myself to tell our friends yet. It is so final and heartbreaking  The boys are so supportive and you all have been too. Thanks so very much.

I did get a card made sometime, I forget when it was. Not very intricate but it did help take my mind off things. I used some pattern paper from DCWV sweater weather and cut out some leaves and inked them and put Glossy Accents on them to look like water drops.   Be kind to one another and have a Happy, safe Halloween.

No card stuff today.

Thank you, thank you all. I was so uplifted when I got home last night and read your comments. It may be a while before I get around to your blogs. I came in last night, ate a sandwich and just sat. I talked to the boys and hubby's sister and that was pretty much it. Just drained.  The day did not go anywhere near like I expected. DH was asleep when I got there. He said "don't do this to me again, I don't like it". and went back to sleep.  The nurse came in and we talked about him. A little later the Priest came in and talked. He asked me if I had considered a feeding tube.  We talked awhile and he said a prayer with me. Then the Dr. came in. Wanted to know if DH was eating.  He did not eat any of his lunch there. Dr. wanted to know if I had considered a feeding tube. I asked why we were having this conversation. Did he think we were near the end? He said no one knows but woud I talk to the Pallative Care team. He said there comes a time when medicine doesn't help the person and there is no sense in giving it to them. So she came in and asked the same thing. We filled out some paperwork because DH has a DNR on file at the hospital. Then, if you can believe it, the social worker came in! I kinda felt bombarded. Every single person I talked to patted me on the arm I just got my flu shot in and it is sore!  I thought I would just have to console hubby but he never talked or woke up.
When I called last night before I went to bed the nurse said he ate a little dinner and was awake for a little while. They had ordered morphine for his pain and maybe that was why he was in such a deep sleep. It's hard to tell. He didn't have morphine at home and he slept all the time. I'll see how things are today.

There is a funny side to all this. It was cold and pouring down rain when I got to the lobby to leave. I had my purse, the folder Pallative Care gave me, a book (whick I never leave home without) and my umbrella. So I started out to the car and unzipped my purse to get my keys. Hung them on my thumb and zipped up my purse. Walked a few steps and realized I don't have my keys. So I started retracing my steps. A lady stopped me and asked if I was looking for my keys and I said yes. She said they just took them to the information desk inside. I thanked her and went back in. The man said they just took them to security. How efficient are they. So I trooped over there and got them. That wouldn't have been an issue except I had done my inhalers early in the morning and I could hardly breathe.  I have COPD. Once I got my keys I stopped in the lobby, put all my stuff down and did my inhaler. Then back outside I went. There, right in front of the door, was a shuttle. Oh happy day. Everyone that got on told the driver I'm in E or I'm in so and so. I didn't know there was a shuttle so I didn't know where I was! He drove right by my car on a different row and then started winding around and I really didn't  know where my car was. I was afraid we would have to go back and start over but we did finally drive by it. That was a blessing.  I didn't make a card yesterday!

I'm off to shower and get to the hospital this morning to see how he is. He is on IV antibotics for the UTI and they think he possibly has aspiration pneumonia. He has been through so many health issues in his life. I truly hate dementia. Be kind to one another.

It is with a sad and heavy heart that I tell you hubby is in the hospital and when he is released he will go directly to the nursing home. The above pictures are how he has been this whole month. I think I can truly say this has been the worst month of our lives and I thank you all for being here with me.  When I got up yesterday he was on the floor of the sunroom. I don't know how long he had been there and he could not get up. The firemen came and his blood pressure was 100/40 and pulse was 167. They called the paramedics and they took him to the hospital.  They couldn't find the hernia unless it was popped out while they were checking. He had chest xray and stomach xray, a head and stomach CT scan and lots of blood work. He slept the entire day and never turned his head to see that I was there. The social worker came in to talk to me and said they could admit him to the nursing home from there when he was released. They did find he had a UTI and will keep him three days to get that under control and also cultural the bloodwork.  I have to tell you that I cried each time when I told the boys but they assured me I was doing the right thing. I know in my heart it is the best for him. He needs more care at this point than I can give him. I'm going to shower and get myself up there this morning and check on him. He will start in on me the minute I walk in the room about taking him home. I dread it. He gets so upset and angry that he is there. Maybe he will be sleeping.

Oh my, we are in a freeze right now. It will warm up later in the week but I am just not ready for cold weather. To be honest, I never am.

This card is made with Doodlebug papers from last year, Twiggy Tree die from Memory Box and the owl is cut out from a DeNami stamp and You're a Hoot is also DeNami. The owl is popped up on the branch. The hill is Lawn Fawn. I use that expression a lot so when I saw that stamp I had to have it. Look at me use that patterned paper! I struggle with that and I do like this card.

No news on hubby. I don't have the results of ultrasound yet. Probably tomorrow. He is coming out of the funk he was in so I think the medicine is out of his system. I got powdered medicine to replace those big pills so that has helped. I have been talking with the nursing home people and my son and I are visiting them Monday afternoon. I just can't do that just yet but I do think it is coming. Speaking of the powdered medicine I have to tell you this. When I went to pick it up they gave me a month of medicine and it was $33. We usually get three months at a time of the pills and they are $184. The powder is $99. for three months. Who knew!  How do you know to ask those questions!  We have been paying $85. more forever. Maybe the pills are stronger, I don't know but they replaced them with the powder. Be kind to one another.

This is my youngest grandsons Halloween card. He is into the dark side right now! Again, I used "stuff" in my stash. It didn't make a dent in my Halloween stash at all, but I feel better using up things I already had to make these last few cards. This is My Minds Eye paper from 2012, a stamped spider from Lawn Fawn, the bat is Jolee's I think, the skull is unknown and the fright night is a sticker. The skull is covered with WOS. I can make Halloween cards for the next forty years by going to my stash! That is kind of sad that one would have so much unused stuff. But I am trying.

Update on hubby - Go Docs thinks he has an ingurinal hernia and that is what is causing him so much pain. They are going to send someone to the house to do an untra sound to determine if that's what it is. They haven't called to set up an appointment yet. I called 911 last Mon. because his leg was huge and hard and he was short of breath. Doc said that was because he missed his water pills for several days. He has been sleeping so much and just missed some and sometimes he refuses to take his meds. He would not go to the hospital so paramedics called Go Docs and they sent the doc out the next morning. So we are waiting for the ultra sound to see. He is no longer short of breath and some of the swelling has gone down. This disease causes patients to have a hard time swallowing and I think that is where we are now. He has three large pills that he is choking on. I am calling today to see if I can crush them for him. Each day seems to bring a new problem. We have reduced his halucination meds back to what they were to see if that is why he was sleeping so much but it hasn't made a difference in that. He is back to yelling at the tv, but no more punching. I just shut it off if he starts yelling.

I had my eye lasered Wed. and it is fine. I can actually see better now. I need to go take my shower and get the day started. Be kind to one another.

A lot going on with hubby. I'll be back as soon as I can.

This card is for my granddaughter made of just punch outs. Since I got everything out for Halloween, I decided to use up all my NBUS things and this was one of them. The hill is a die from Lawn Fawn.

See you soon, be kind to one another.

I had to turn the furnace on yesterday. It got pretty chilly in the house so it was time. We also have a lot of wind so the patio chairs came inside too. It will warm back up next week for a while. The family will be here for Oct. birthdays tomorrow. Lots of fun, food and football.

Todays card is not stamped at all. It is a My Minds Eye sheet of punch outs and a snippet of paper I've used before. The bats are a rub on. It was quick and easy and one of my favorite cards. I love the sparkle of it. I did stamp a sentiment on the inside. These were all in my tub of Halloween stuff and since I am trying to use my supplies up I used them. The only thing I bought this year for Halloween is the Booyah set from Lawn Fawn and I HAD to have that because it is so cute. Otherwise since I have a whole plastic tub full of  "stuff" I couldn't justify buying anymore. But I did get several new things for fall and Christmas. I have two tubs of Christmas "stuff" but again Lawn Fawn got me!

I am entering this card in the http://www.chouxchouxpaperart.com/search?updated-max=2015-09-21T01:00:00-05:00&max-results=7. She has a Lawn Fawn gift certificate as a gift!!



To my friends on the east coast, be safe from all the rain and storms. To my friends in Oregon, my thoughts and prayers are with you for the sad tragedy.